“Whatsh da total, Kylene?”

I shoot an exasperated look at the gyrating barmaid who can’t seem to stand still for a moment.

The blood elf wiggles her behind to the music as she bends over to do the math on a parchment.

“OK, that was nine flagons of mead and three jugs of bourbon. Let’s see …”

She starts counting with her fingers while bopping her head side to side.

I wave her off dismissively and toss a few gold coins on the counter.

“Keep de change.”

I make me way up the Lower City ramp towards the draenei gryphon handler.

“Allerian Shtronghold, pwease … hic!”

The tentacle-faced alien crossed his arms.

“You’re not smashed, are you? I’m not sure I should let you fly in this condition. You might fall off during the ride.”

I cackled, slapping his thigh.

“Bub, yer speaking to a dwaahf. We knows howsa to hold our leequor!”

After a brief pause, the skeptical draenei summons a gryphon and warns me that he’s not liable in case anything happened. Blah blah blah. I was fahine!

A jolt woke me up. I cough out a mouthful of dirt.

“Snerk. Wha?”

I had dozed off during the ride. The gryphon shook me off its back when we landed. Grrr! I lift me hand to shake a fist at the departing bird and am rendered speechless by the sight of a pink elekk in front of me.

A pink elekk.

I reach out to touch it and fall through, stumbling onto me knees. I reach out again and get a face full of grass. I lie there, staring at large pink toenails until the rosy vision flickers and finally fades away.

OK, maybe the draenei had a point.