Licking the Very Berry Cream off me fingers, I reach into the box of chocolates on me lap and pull out a cherry-topped Buttermilk Delight. With me other hand, I lift up the novel I was reading and pick up where I left off.

As Nahni glided up, the grizzled warrior gave her a hard stare.

“I suppose you’re here to collect the reward for killing those murlocs?”

Her eyes wandered down to the glowing broadsword at his side.

“That depends on what the reward is, Marcus.” She twirled her hair playfully, pretending not to notice how he shifted uncomfortably in her presence. “I may not want it.”

I fumble me hand around in the box distractedly, looking for a Dark Desire treat when me breathing slows as the untamed, savage hero speaks!

Marcus stepped towards her, bristling with a mixture of fear and anger, “The reward is not negotiable!” He paused for a moment while gathering his nerve, and pressed himself against her diminutive form. Their lips met hotly, melting her frost armor spell in a torrent of sweltering vapor.

I close me eyes, savoring the moment of sexual tension and unbridled loins and what have ye, and sigh dreamily.

I hear a snickering sound and sit upright, eyes flying open. Had I been caught reading this trash?! Me face turns red when I realize that out of all people to walk in on me, it just had to be Ringo. HAD to be him.

Ringo snatches the book out of me hand, chuckling. I protest, attempting to grab the book back, but he puts his hand on me forehead, keeping me down and with his other hand, he reads outloud in a mock falsetto,

“So, is there another step to this quest?” She teased, her eyes glittering with excitement.

“RINGO! GIVE! IT! BACK!”

Ringo chortles gleefully as he dangles the book over me head, me arms attempting to punch him in the gut as he skips backwards to avoid me blows. I then cross me arms as the dumb ass puckers his lip and makes kissing noises, laughing at himself, thinking he’s sooo clever.

He hands the book back to me, but I keep me arms crossed and continue to pout. He then tosses the book at my side and reaches into me candy box before I could react and grabs a handful of chocolate treats.

“Y’know, that is going to go on for several hundred more pages without advancing the plot,” Ringo snickers.

I pick up me candy box and throw it at his retreating figure.

“Ass!”